fitting into my jeans: part 2

In my previous fitting into my jeans article, I outlined how I wanted to go down the path of being true to myself. I gave a (purposely) vague outline of what fitting into my jeans meant and that I was taking the first step towards being true to myself. In this post, I’m offering context on why I want to focus on integrity and why I’m on this journey.

If not now, when?
Being true to myself is something I’ve struggled with for a while. I’ve always struggled with integrity when it comes to my career. I consider myself a lifelong learner, and I know this has to be the next lesson.

Radical Candor
I ended part one of this journey declaring that I was going to start off with Radical Candor. What is it? Radical Candor started off as a book, Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity by Kim Scott.

Scott is a New York Times and Wall Street Journal Bestselling Author, she led AdSense, YouTube, and Doubleclick Online Sales and Operations at Google. Today, Scott has a podcast and offers advisory services on her philosophy of Radical Candor. I first learned about Scott when I saw a video of her talk, from a HubSpot’s Inbound 2016.

What Does Being Professional Mean?
During her talk, she said something that stuck with me:

“Somehow this advice to be professional so often gets translated to mean leave your emotions, leave your humanity, leave the very best part of yourself at home. You’re never going to do the best work of your life if you leave half of yourself, especially the best half of yourself at home. So bring your whole self to work…’

– Kim Scott, HubSpot Inbound 2016

After listening to the talk, I decided to read Scott’s book.
I was fascinated yet afraid of her philosophy – but why?

After reading Scott’s book, I was fascinated yet afraid of her philosophy – but why?

fitting into my jeans ring
I was afraid of how others would perceive me and I wanted control over that. Hell, I still want control over that – I don’t know if that’s something anyone can have control over.

Looking back, I question if it was even worth me trying to control other’s perception of me. For example, a few years ago there was slew of articles about whether or not women should wear their engagement rings during job interviews. A quick Google Search, will bring up more than fifty million search results on engagement rings and interviews.

I have taken my engagement ring off before heading into interviews. Is it a mistake? I don’t have the answer to that. On one hand (no pun intended), I would always tell myself that it isn’t anyone’s business to assume anything about me – and that I shouldn’t give anyone room to make assumptions if I can help it. On the other hand, is it a waste of time to think about things like this?

Embracing My Inner Laurie Bream
If you watch Silicon Valley, you know Laurie Bream, is the Lead Partner at Raviga Capital, played by Suzanne Cryer. Laurie is as straightforward as it gets.

If you don’t know Laurie, here’s a good snapshot of her no nonsense approach to communication. The exchange below, is where Laurie is meeting with Richard for a business meeting:

Laurie: Sorry I am late.
Richard: Hey, Laurie. Did you, uh…
Laurie: Induce? Yes, this morning and here I am.

S05E01 – Grow Fast or Die Slow

I wouldn’t be able to embrace all of Laurie Bream, that’s just not who I am. However, a little bit of Laurie isn’t a bad thing.

So What Does All This Mean? Next Steps
For me, this means I need to find more objective ways to show integrity. Implementing the philosophy of Radical Candor, and  focusing on communication is the first way I’ll be fitting into my jeans.

The second way is to evaluate my career success from a more quantitative perspective. How? By revisiting my career holistically and replacing the qualitative with quantitative. I’m still tinkering with the best way to do this, I’ll be sure to share this exercise with you in part three of this blog series!

Your Turn!
Tell me what your thoughts about integrity are. Do you ever feel like you’re not being true to yourself? Or are you a badass who doesn’t have this problem – either way, I’d love to hear from you! Feel free to ask me directly, leave a comment below, or leave a comment on social.